For the cowgirl with a green thumb, a dark sense of humor, and very little patience. The I Bury Things T-Shirt features the phrase, “I bury things. You know—plants, assholes, and such,” above a Western silhouette leaning against a ranch fence, finished with small wildflower details. A matching iCowboy logo on the front keeps the look clean and understated.

Available in white and light gray, this tee blends country charm, deadpan humor, and just enough menace to keep people guessing.

Plants preferred. Assholes optional.